thinking time

after a long conversation with my friend, i was
touched. i know we were same (thinking and action).
and the conversation also took me to
flashback bout my relationship with my teddy bear
and even my ex huhu..
what actually i want in my relationship?
as a human being, of cos' i will answer i want to love and being love,
to care and being care, to share ups and downs with him,
and to be with him live happily ever after.
but inside me said, she want him!!
conquer everything bout him.
that was my evil side..
*sigh*
i wonder how long this relationship will go.
i'm scared of losing him.*sigh*
this girl just recover from her heart-broken and if she have to
face the same situation once again, she might lost!
healing process take time..
i need to admit it hehe..
flashback to 2007~
every single minute i blamed why i supposed to
met and knowing my ex.
every night before sleep i prayed to god
to gave me strength to forget him.
every single hours i was thinking why
i can't forget him and why i can't let him go.
that was me in 2007 til middle of the 2008.
flashback to 2008~
i met new guy.
we start our relationship as a friend.
suddenly it knock my door.*sigh*
but
i let him go cos i know
i'm not him.
2009~
met this guy..
he look ok to me hehe~
i dunno where he got my no but now i know
he got it from my friend.
i lied to him about my status
as a married woman with 2 children
(seriously, i dunno why i lied to him) hehe~
but he continuously callin' and text me
with the excuse as a friend, even i never reply his text.
keep advice me bout everything make me felt irritating
bout him.
but when hard moment
he is the one who pops in front of me.
he never brought up the past.
he is there just for me.
i was feel like why him and why not
someone else.
i promise to myself to give me and him
a chance if he ask hahaha~
and YES he asked me..
and
there is a new story, new chapter,
new love and new me start..
ME and Mr.Teddy Bear
and now the fear of losing him haunt me
that what i called PARANOID!!
huhuhuhuhu :(
*sigh*

p/s: dy,u so ja'at with me owh.. why u made me become paranoid huhu~
*paranoid- fear of losing

have fun

today's one of my colleague birthday..
so happy birthday to saadah (",)
she was lucky cos the class
sang a birthday song 4 times..
i wish my birthday
also like that..hehe
but
unfortunately
my birthday on semester break
so that's mean no one will sing for me..

during pn sham class today,
we learn how to conduct
role play and psychodrama
in psychiatric field~
it's so fun
to watched 'em act
(^_^)

other news are..
our class got new curtain
hahaha~
it's floral!!!
full of flower hahaahaha
like English home concept..

p/s: am not feeling well.. coughed attackin' me huhu :(
same to my d too..

psy class

been in psychiatric class
make me felt that i am lucky
to be normal~
feel pity to them who are unlucky..

funny to heard about them
but at the same time sad
to think bout their journey..

they don't want to be like that
but
because of the extreme fear
maybe i should call it
PHOBIA
their tend to be one
of the
psychiatric patient..

p/s: placing clinical this time i choose kedah and penang..
dunno which one i will get it.. i just hope i can make it..
i want to choose my hometown for elektif but the placing
still not open.. huhu :(

today~

my class start today..
we got bk 4 i guess
so small compared to our class last sem
huhu~
nvm lar we only using this class for 11 weeks only
then we go clinical placing once again..

friends??
hmmm~ quite ok lor..
still early sem so i didn't expecting more..
just wait and see lor..

my d???
hmm~
today, we got some misunderstood
huhu~
we just normal couple..
sometimes ok and sometimes not
hehe~
but for sure..
i miss him
hehe~

two a.m

yeap!! it's 2 a.m
and i'm stuck here at lcct
sittin' at mcD
in front of my lappy
with the eyes became small and small
am tryin' not to asleep

waitin' her here
yes!! i'm waitin someone
haha~ roomate why u so late????
hohoho~

bloggin' here alone
with no one i know
is the 1st time experienced
pity on me huhu~

guess what?
kek lapis swk is waitin for me at hostel...
hahaha~

lol!!
i forgot to mention here~
i cannot eat seafood
and popo said she want me to eat vege only
huhu~
vegetarian?????
i can't imagine i'm a vege at 2010
*sigh*
BUT
i can imagine the new me
at the end of the year
muaahahaha~
LoL!!!

New Year 2010

happy new year!!
new year
new age
new resolution
haha~

flashed back my conversation with my bestfriend~

T: gal,what is ur resolution this year?
M: no 1, i want a boyfriend (laugh).. U?
T: (laugh) i don't need that
M: remember our promised?
T: yes, of cos'
M: i think we should decrease our weight
T: (laugh) yes,i agree with u..
since that was ur target since sem 1
M: this sem we need to make it
T: ok,later we buy shoes
M: yup,at kl k

funny to think about resolution
every year we need to do this
it was like a tradition to us
huhu~
but does we make the resolution succeed?
haha~
80% is no *sigh*

for me, every year i made the same wish
but i should take a challenge for this year
so, i decide to change my resolution
hahaha~
perhaps, i can do it!!
gudluck,gal!!!